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Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label movies. Show all posts

Friday, 2 June 2017

6 Brilliant but Underrated Thrillers You Need to See

June 02, 2017 0
It’s a horrible truth, but finding good thrillers are nigh impossible. A big part of the problem is how easily thrillers are confused or heaped in with horror films. Because of that – and a regrettably small (by comparison) fan-base – the market for thrillers just isn't what it should be. There are so few good thrillers made that they often get lost in the Hollywood milling machine, or get harshly judged by critics for not being ‘mainstream’ enough. But they’re still there; little dark jewels just waiting for someone to find them. Here are:

6 Brilliant but Underrated Thrillers You Need to See



1. Breakdown (1997)

I remember seeing Breakdown for the first time. I was expecting another cheap, cliché horror passing itself off as a thriller, mainly due to the basic plot. You know; the old car breaks down, trucker offers a ride, person disappears… I’m sure you get the idea. No, I didn’t have high hopes – or any kind of hope, really – for Breakdown. The only reason I decided to just stick it out was due to my not-quite-faded schoolgirl crush on Kurt Russel (thank you, Tango and Cash).

I was wrong. I was so very wrong. Breakdown has its cliché elements, sure, but the movie is all the better for it – especially because of how skilfully the cliché’s are lampshaded and made to work for the movie as a whole.

The moment that Amy, wife to Kurt Russel’s Jeff, gets into the stranger’s rig you just know things are going to go wrong – and it does, in a big way. Every second between that moment and the final embrace is an action packed, nerve-wracking roller-coaster ride. Half the time you can’t even be sure who you can and can’t trust. And, for the time, the stunts are not to be sneered at. The driving alone is enough to make your hair stand on end.

And then there’s the end… I’m not going to spoil it for you, but if you’re a fan of the nail-biting, action driven type of thriller, then you just can’t go wrong with this beauty.


2. Disturbia (2007)

Disturbia is one of the slightly lighter thrillers on this list, but still completely deserving of its place. Starring Shia LeBeouf as Kale, you’re assured to experience a certain hyper-active feeling throughout the entire film. To top it off, the main character is pretty much confined to his house for the majority of the movie, so a certain measure of stir crazy jumps right off the screen and starts itching along your nerves as well. And what does dearly delinquent Kale do to pass the time? He starts to spy on his neighbours. He watches them so well that he even memorizes their routines.

But then he starts noticing something strange about the neighbour across the street. And that’s where the light-hearted, somewhat dramatic yet still comedic feel of the film takes a complete turn. Suddenly every moment starts feeling like Kale and his two friends are going to get caught in the act by a very sinister, very dangerous man.

I, for one, will never forget the way David Morse (the creepy neighbour) catches Sarah Roemer (Shia’s love-interest), in the act. The way he… ‘let’s her down gently’ gave me ice-cold chills. Don’t ask me why Disturbia wasn’t a massive hit, because I don’t have an answer for you that makes any kind of sense. Just watch the damn thing – it’s worth it.


3. The Skeleton Key (2005)

I think one of my favourite things about The Skeleton Key is the setting. Unlike 99% of movies that are all based in major cities (enough of L.A. and N.Y. already!), Skeleton Key takes place smack in the middle of a Louisiana swamp. Considering that the film has a central hoodoo motif, that’s just perfect. They certainly didn’t shirk on the cast, either. Our heroin, Caroline, is played by Kate Hudson; a young woman who takes a position caring for the elderly invalid Benjamin (John Hurt). His wife, Violet (Gena Rowlands) doesn’t like Caroline one bit, but due to the insistence of the estate lawyer, played by Peter Sarsgaard, she gives Caroline the job.

By this point we are deep in the Louisiana swamp. In an old, creaky, gigantic mansion. Without a single mirror. And a creaky attic. What could possibly go wrong?

If you’re going to watch this and expect the usual romcom Kate, you’re going to be sorely disappointed. Instead she blends in perfectly with the dark feel of the entire film. But, more than anything else, it’s the ending that I love. It’s perfect. It’s logical. It’s risky, and it pays of in spades – any other ending than the one you get would just feel like a big cheat. And Skeleton Key doesn’t cheat. It gives you the perfect thrill all the way through.

By the way, I’m telling you to watch it more than once. Take the advice. You’ll miss so much the first time around that the second time will feel like you’re watching a whole new movie.


4. Julia’s Eyes (2010)

It’s my personal suspicion that Julia’s Eyes didn’t get the kind of coverage it deserved due to a certain similar thriller film (*Cough-The Eye-Cough*) that wasn’t all that good. Whatever similarities there might have been between that film and Guillermo del Toro’s Julia’s Eyes are purely bloody coincidental.

Julia’s Eyes is all about a young woman, Julia, who is losing her eyesight – just like her sister had before her. But although it looks like her sister committed suicide, Julia doesn’t believe it. She’s convinced there’s something else going on, and she goes out of her way to prove it. She does find some evidence, clues pointing towards an ‘invisible man’ – no, that’s not a supernatural reference.

It’s just a man that’s so absolutely mundane and forgettable that no one can quite seem to remember him - and somehow the entire premise is that much more creepy for it.

Like the others, I’m not going to spoil this for you. Needless to say, the ending is not what you’d expect – and when it comes to thrillers, that’s the best kind of ending to get.


5. Premium Rush (2012)

Although Premium Rush didn’t do badly, it could have done better – and not for lack of trying. There is something about Premium Rush that’s as much fun as the adrenaline it forces through your veins. The speeds to which Joseph Gordon-Levitt pushes that bicycle – being a bike messenger - is crazy, not to mention dangerous. The stunts that are performed are just as brilliant, and Joseph paid the price for it on set a few times, too. But every moment of that insanity keeps your nerves taught as you wait for some inevitable on-screen crash.

Our villain is player by Michael Shannon and, as usual, he brings a wonderfully over-the-top short temper and menacing feel to the whole thing. The film by-line says “Ride Like Hell”, and let me tell you, I couldn’t have said it better myself. I would want to put as much distance between myself and Shannon as I possibly could.

Word of advice – make sure you have something to bring you down afterwards. You’re going to be experiencing an adrenaline rush of epic proportions and it lasts from beginning to end. Trust me, by the time the film reaches its ending, you’re wound up as tight as a spring. That, I think, is a testament to just how well done Premium Rush really was.


6. Dead Ringers (1988)

I find it highly appropriate that Dead Ringer’s was released the year I was born, because it’s my favourite film on this list by a good mile. It is the epitome of the thriller genre, screwing with your mind every step of the way – just like the ‘two’ main characters’ screw with and manipulate every other person they meet. Jeremy Irons plays the double lead role as twins Beverly and Elliot Mantle; identical twins and rock stars in the gynaecology world.

I have to say this – throughout the film the existing and growing bond between Bev (quiet and shy) and Ellie (brash, confident and quite the charmer) is shown in an almost beautiful way. Their closeness is so intense that they swap out identities with uncanny ease – in many ways, they look like a single being split between two physical bodies. And that is as much as I’m going to say about that.

It’s the wedge of love and growing independence that finally smashes the balance between the brothers to smithereens, and the results are catastrophic for them both. The film is tense, and as grim as it’s beautiful. But it’s the ending, such as it is, that captures both the beauty and the horror in a single moment – and it’s what makes this film one of the best thrillers I have ever, and will ever, see. If you can pick just one film to watch from this list, and if you consider yourself a true fan of the thriller genre, this is the one I’m going to recommend.




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Tuesday, 30 May 2017

6 of the Greatest Superpowerless Superheroes

May 30, 2017 0
We know Superman – faster than a speeding bullet, nigh indestructible – and radioactive spider-ly empowered Spiderman. We know Thor, and Hulk, The Fantastic Four, all of the mutants from X-men… To say there are a lot of powerful superheroes is an understatement, and we love (almost) all of them. But, surrounded with all these amazing abilities, it’s often hard to forget that some of the greatest ‘superheroes’ are just ordinary people who have some pretty awesome skills or weapons. Here are:

6 of the Greatest Superpowerless Superheroes



1. Tony Stark, Iron Man; Marvel

Come now, let’s be honest. He’s Tony Stark, Iron Man. He needs no introduction, save to say that he is a “genius. billionaire, playboy, philanthropist”, and only because that’s his own words – although we suspect ‘superhero’ can now be tacked on to that. He is an ingenious engineer, who entered MIT at the age of 15 and boasts master’s degrees in electric engineering and physics. He’s the perfect combination between the sexy cool guy and the basement nerd. In the comics he also pulls a bit of a ‘Bruce Wayne’ and no one suspects the playboy to also be the powerful Iron Man – although I’m sure many would agree that the cocky Marvelverse version suits him much better. That being said… read the comics. The stories are insanely brilliant.

But despite his ingenuity, and an awesome flying suit that can apparently withstand a beating from Thor himself, Tony Stark is still very much a regular human being. He may have electronics just about everywhere, but that doesn’t change facts: Iron Man is an awesomely vain bastard in an overpowered suit of armour.

And we love him for it.


2. Bruce Wayne, Batman; DC

You can’t talk about the one playboy and not talk about the other (although, in our personal opinion, Tony pulls it off with a fair bit more style). He, too, is described as the billionaire, playboy and philanthropist, although what he lacks in genius – that’s what he’s got employees for – he makes up for more than enough with his fighting skills. Batman is also one of the greatest contradictions in comics – he serves almost as a force of anarchy in his vigilantism, but despite often being depicted as one of the darkest and most brutal heroes he has such a stringent moral code that he never takes a life.

He might have lots of awesome gadgets (and what fan hasn’t wished for their own batarang?) but aside from his armour, nothing really gives Batman a leg up against his enemies in one on one combat.

That is all Bruce.


3. Hal Jordan, The Green Lantern; DC

Okay, so Green Lantern has some of the best powers ever. He’s almost invulnerable, he can fly, and manipulate the energy of his own willpower to create just about anything he wants – from comically large hammers to… well, anything he wants or needs at pretty much any point. What makes Hal such a great Lantern is the fact that, as a person, he has exceptional willpower. In fact, seeing Hal as the Lantern it’s easy to forget something very important: he’s just a man.

Although his willpower makes him a great Lantern, it’s the Power Ring that makes it possible to save the Earth in his creatively cocky way.


4. Hank Pym and Scott Lang, Ant-man; Marvel

When it comes to the awesomeness of Ant-Man, you have to talk about Hank Pym before you can talk about others who took up the mantle later. Hank was a Biophysicist before he was anything else, and then he created the suit to become an epic mystery solving superhero, later on joined by his girlfriend Janet, who became the Wasp. From lab coat wearing genius to founding member of the Avengers – you’ve got to give the man kudos.

Scott Lang took up the mantle later, after Hank decided to explore alternate identities such as Giant-Man, Goliath, Yellowjacket and Wasp. He started out as an engineer, although he became a burglar when it just wasn’t exciting enough anymore. Yeah, he was caught, but he was such a brilliant engineer that Stark International hired him to install the new security system in the Avengers Mansion (now wouldn’t it have been fun if that was in the movies?). Originally Scott stole the suit knowing full well what it was, and doing so to save his daughter’s life with the full intention of turning himself in to Hank – but the good Doc made him Ant-Man full time instead.

Like the others, Ant-Man’s ‘superpower’ of growing and shrinking, and talking with ants, all stem from the use of a brilliantly engineered suit. It’s his ability to think creatively on his feet, though, that makes Scott worthy of this list.


5. Walter Kovacs, Rorschach; DC

Walter Kovacs, a.k.a. Rorschach, is one of my personal favourites. Walter isn’t the type of guy you’d even give a second look; in fact, he’s described as quite ugly, looking like a homeless guy who always carries a “THE END IS NIGH” sign. Nothing about the average height, scraggly man would even hint at him being a crime fighting vigilante. Even Walter considers himself ugly, and thinks of his mask as his ‘true’ face. Many even consider him mentally ill – and with a past like his, that’s not hard to believe.

What makes Rorscach both brilliant and feared is that is moral code is absolute. As far as he is concerned it’s black and white, and no grey space in between. His own unwillingness to compromise leads to his death when he orders Dr. Manhattan to kill him, as he refuses to be part of Veidt’s (Ozymandias) conspiracy.

But what makes him a highly effective superhero is that he has a near unbreakable will, even in the face of overwhelming odds, peak physical strength (for a human), an almost unnatural sense of timing and precision and exceptionally resourceful – he’s shown as being capable of turning just about any every day item into a very effective weapon. He’s a gymnast, a boxer and a pretty good brawler on top. He’s even described as “tactically brilliant and unpredictable”. Hell, the only real gadget he has is a gas powered grappling gun – he’s not nearly as dependent on suits and weapons like the others on this list.

He is, undeniably, super by simply being the most badass human crime fighter he can be.


6. MCU Natalia Romanova/Natasha Romanoff, Black Widow; Marvel

If we were going strictly by the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Black Widow would be deserving of a bona fide position on this list. Trained in a Soviet Red Room to be a highly effective assassin, Black Widow is adept at nearly every type of martial arts, and one heck of a marksman. She’s got the skills, she’s got the tools – and, as we can see in the movies, she’s got a creative streak that trumps all of the gents combined. Who else would attempt to talk the Hulk down without so much as a single piece of supersuit between her and those big green fists? Without a doubt, MCU Natasha deserves a spot here…

Unfortunately, the original Black Widow is a lot more like the Cap than you’d think. Black Widow – or Natalia Romanova – was born in 1928 and given a serum that was very similar to Captain America’s. She also doesn’t age, and has the same super-human strength and agility. She was trained by Bucky (yes, Winter Soldier Bucky), and she was the one who brainwashed Hawkeye to help her kill Iron Man – before becoming one of the good guys, of course.

Let’s be honest, though – Black Widow is a great superheroin, no matter how you look at it.




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Tuesday, 23 May 2017

6 Perfectly Wicked Disney Villain Songs

May 23, 2017 0
Disney is pretty well known for the songs that make up about 70% of every animated movie they make. Although none of them can really be called bad, there are a few that stand out as really, really good. And no, I’m not talking about “Let it go”. Yes, that was a good song. Yes, every person in the world has probably heard and sung it. Now let it go. This list does focus on good songs, but we’re going to leave heroes, heroines and princesses out of it. Instead we are going to look at the worst of the worst, the most malicious – and delicious – songs. Here are:

6 Perfectly Wicked Disney Villain Songs



1. Snuff Out The Light, Yzma’s Song – Emperor’s New Groove

This is probably the most tragic song on this list – not because it’s sad in any way, but because this brilliant tune was actually cut from the final film! It’s a tragic loss to the world of villain themes. Yzma was a good, if somewhat comical, villain. There’s no denying that. But the lyrics of the song provide some much needed insight into Yzma as a person and as a villain – backstory and motifs left out in the final film that prevents Yzma from becoming the great villain she could have been. Did I mention that she happened to be quite the looker when she was young?

The song itself is sung by the late legend Eartha Kitt, and good lawd, does she pull it off. The tune is catchy as all hell, with a type of island-ish, big-band feel, and it’s near impossible to listen to it without wanting to start dancing. Or singing along, for that matter. Thankfully the song itself survived the cut, and you can sing your heart out alongside Yzma and Eartha by getting the official soundtrack. Or, you know, just looking it up on Youtube.

“Whatever it takes to keep my looks, you really can’t blame a girl for trying!”


2. Be Prepared, Scar’s Song – The Lion King

There cannot be a person on this earth that hasn’t heard ‘Be Prepared’ from The Lion King. And if you just so happen to be the only person who’s never heard a lion sing about “the coup of the century”… I pity you. Jeremy Irons performs the voice of Scar, although some parts of the song is sung by Jim Cummings (due to Irons’ voice giving out – but he does a damn good job of never letting you realise it).

Elton John composed the music for the piece; the rather cheery feel he gave the song is made that much creepier by the dark theme. The imagery is to die for, with the lighting, shadows and the lines of hyenas marching along all reflecting a very eerie Nazi-propaganda style.

The bottom line is this – every single second that Scar insults the hyenas while plotting his murderous takeover is just delightful. In a darkly demented, oddly enjoyable way. And it kind of makes you want to cheer for him… just a little. Long live the King!


3. Mother Knows Best, Mother Gothel – Tangled

This song isn’t just a villain’s song – it’s downright cruel and abusive. The song is sung by Mother Gothel – brilliantly voiced by Donna Murhpy – in a very cheery, jazz-pop mix that makes you want to smile and bounce happily. Especially since the entire song is like a little mother-daughter chat. That is, until you listen to the lyrics. Then things take a turn for the horrific.

The first clues are visual. Not one of the ‘loving’ gestures are made towards Rapunzel herself. Every little hug, kiss and pat is directed at Rapunzel’s youth-restoring hair. Gothel doesn’t give a damn about the girl, you can see it in these clues alone. But if you go on to listen to the words themselves you quickly realize that the entire thing is about scaring Rapunzel and putting her down. Gothel makes it quite clear to Rapunzel that there’s just no way she would survive on her own; she’s sloppy, clumsy, gullible, ditzy, and – not in so many words – getting fat.

Yes, Mother of the Year award winner right there. But, as much as I hate to say it, the combination of a happy tune and heart-wrenchingly cruel lyrics makes this one epic villain’s song.


4. Friends on the Other Side, Dr. Facilier – The Princess and the Frog

This is, undeniably, both one of the most fun and one of the blatantly dark villain songs ever used in a Disney film. While other songs may allude to some other evil or power, Dr. Faciliar pretty much tells you right up front that he’s dealing with some pretty nasty spirits and loa (those are the voodoo spirits, by the way.). He does all of it with a big smile, sugar-coated promises and jaunty Cajun music. And if, at any point, you start feeling like this song is reminding you of something, look to number six on this very list.

Understandably, critics raved about the song. It was compared to everything from ‘Be Prepared’ to ‘Poor, Unfortunate Souls’, praised for its trippy visuals and sinister feel. The song is, to say the least, a guilty pleasure. And, when his ‘friends’ sing the song right back to him when they drag the good Doc’s soul to hell, it’s somehow still as much fun. If you find yourself smirking at Dr. Facilier’s grave… know that you’re not the only one.


5. Hellfire, Judge Claude Frollo – The Hunchback of Notre Dame

If there ever was a villain song that did NOT belong in a CHILDREN’S movie, this is the one. It’s the song that single-handedly put Hunchback of Notre Dame at risk of getting a higher than PG age restriction. For a Disney film.

The song itself is fantastic – it’s incredibly dramatic, and the use of a Latin confession prayer makes it feel that much more appropriate. The highly religious visuals combine with the music to create an incredibly heavy atmosphere – especially when cloaked figures start accusing Frollo of putting himself in the soul-threatening position he’s in.

The entire piece deals with Frollo’s lust for Esmerelda, his struggle with this ‘sin’, his fear of being condemned into hell and, naturally, how all the blame is to be placed squarely on Esmerelda and the devil’s shoulders. From the opening line to the final moment that Frollo passes out on the floor, spread like a man crucified… it’s all perfect. Darkly, disturbingly perfect.

Burn, Frollo. Burn.


6. Poor Unfortunate Souls, Ursula – The Little Mermaid

Arguably, Poor Unfortunate Souls is one of the best villain songs ever written for a Disney movie – and it must be said that the performance by Pat Carroll is nothing short of epic. It’s dramatic, it’s showy, it’s deceptive – Poor Unfortunate Souls is everything a villain’s theme should be. At the same time, the animators need to get some serious credit here.

That face as it belts out the final “Poor, unfortunate SOUL!” is enough to give anyone nightmares for life.

Like the earlier mentioned Friends on the Other Side, in this song Ursula plays on the fears and desires of her victims to trick them into deals. Naturally, she demands a very reasonable price for her services. It’s a price that gets near impossible to pay and one that, if forfeited, will turn you into a very, very unfortunate soul – an odd, misshapen little worm stuck to the sea-witch’s floor. That’s one way to spend eternity.




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Wednesday, 17 May 2017

6 Hit Movies That Almost Weren't Made

May 17, 2017 2
Hollywood is not merciful on its faithful. There are thousands of films that never make it to the holy grail of the silver screen; those who do make it aren’t always the ones deserving of drinking from the cup of ever-lasting life (Battlefield Earth, anyone?). This is an industry interested in money, money, money, after all, and there are only so many risks a studio will take. Unfortunately, this often leaves potentially great scripts drifting from studio to studio, and we’re left wondering how many future classics were left in the dust. Thankfully the promised land does still have its heroes - the producers who are willing to take the leap and back the underdog – for whom the world cheers when their risks make it big. Here are:

6 Hit Movies That Almost Weren't Made



1. Pulp Fiction, 1994 – Quentin Tarantino, Miramax Films

One of the biggest cult classics of all time – and bona fide National Film Registry protected film – is definitely the place to start. Let’s get money out of the way right off the bat; this little Tarantino beauty had a budget of around $8.5 million, and drew in an estimated $213.9 million at the box office. If that’s your only definition of a film being great, consider the requirement met.

The script had more than just a rocky start. Columbia Tristar went so far as to say that “This is the worst thing ever written. It makes no sense. Someone’s dead and then they're alive. It’s too long, violent, and unfilmable.”. Mike Medavoy, the big boss, the film was just “too demented”, and was all the happy to sell if off to another studio – may he suffer terminal case of the green gills for the rest of time.

Enter our hero, Harvey Weinstein from Miramax. He wasn’t so easily cowed, and stepped forward to take the risk on dearly demented Tarantino’s work. The result was nothing less than extraordinary, with the film taking home several awards and accolades from critics. The studio made a hefty profit, and actors and actresses like John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson, Uma Thurman and Bruce Willis’s careers all received a nice little boost (or revitalization) – and it definitely cemented Tarantino’s place in history.

But it was the fans who scored big, and Pulp Fiction was quickly elevated to the status of cult classic; a “national phenomenon”, as one critic put it. We can’t help but agree that the Library of Congress had its head screwed on right when it voted to include Pulp Fiction in the National Film Registry. And we will never, ever forget just how unhinged hitman Jules Winnfield looked while reciting from the Bible. Lay that vengeance, man. Lay it right on.


2. Star Wars, 1977 to Present – George Lucas, Lucasfilm, 20th Century Fox & Walt Disney

If this needs any kind of explanation, you’ve been living under a rock for a good forty years. Not only is Star Wars one of the top three highest grossing film franchises – only beaten by much more recent franchises MCU and Harry Potter, mind you – but it’s also the second highest grossing media franchise of all time, and Guinness Records Title holder for the most successful film merchandising franchise. Again, if money spoke, you’ve got the entire works of Shakespeare laid out here.

To the millions of Star Wars fans around the world, the very idea that Star Wars might never have been made is unimaginable. Regardless, it’s undeniable fact that one of the most extensive fictional space universes very nearly got the chop. It wasn’t that there was a problem somewhere in the script that could be rewritten and fixed; the problem was the concept. The very idea that something like it could be made in space was, to many studios, a laughable idea, and an unnecessary risk.

We thank our lucky stars that 20th Century Fox picked it up (shame on you, Universal), but production wasn’t without it’s hiccups. There were storms, technical problems… hell, even the actors didn’t take the movie seriously, thinking that it would probably be a flop. But Star Wars got its day, and the fans received a fantastical film franchise that will probably last out another forty years – and more, we hope.


3. Back to the Future, 1985 to 1990 – Robert Zemeckis, Amblin Entertainment & Universal

Only two short years ago the world celebrated both the 20th anniversary of a brilliant film franchise, but also the fact that reality had finally caught up with its time travelling universe. That’s right, we’re talking about Back to the Future. Like both the previous entries, Back to the Future made significant profit – but no real fan cares about the money. What we do care about is that we were lucky enough to get yet another timeless classic to feast our eyes on. And lucky is just about the right way to put it, too.

First Columbia Pictures tossed it. Why? It wasn’t “sexual” enough – because who doesn’t want to see a time travelling teenager (Michael J. Fox!) getting it on? Studio after studio turned the script away – even Disney politely declined due to that whole painfully awkward Marty & Mom disaster. But luckily Robert Zemeckis happened to be buddies with Steven Spielberg (although he made sure to make a name for himself first with Romancing the Stone before going to his friend), and luckily Spielberg had a few friends of his own who were willing to take a risk.

There’s no denying that the result was a big hit that proved its popularity through multiple generations. But let’s not forget that it made a few other contributions, too. What real Back to the Future fan can deny that they’re itching to get their hands on a hoverboard?


4. Blade Runner, 1982 – Ridley Scot, The Ladd Company, Shaw Brothers, Blade Runner Partnership & Warner Brothers

Blade Runner is far from one of the most profitable films on this list, true. But let’s be honest, money is not the be all and end all dictator of what really makes a fantastic film – and there’s a lot about Blade Runner to love. It’s become a cult favourite, is thought to be the example of the neo-noir genre, and is still considered by many to be one of the best science fiction films ever made. It was awarded a Hugo Award for Best Dramatic Presentation, and has also been inducted in the National Film Registry. Ridley Scott himself considers Blade Runner as his most complete and personal film.

This particular fan could wax poetic about Blade Runner and the complexities of who is good and who is bad for hours on end, but this isn’t a review.

This cultural classic almost never made it to the big screen. It was inspired by a novel called “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep” by Philip K. Dick, and the author held understandably high standards to any script that was proposed to him. Ridley Scott and David Peoples managed to get a thumbs up from him, and Scott also managed to get an increased budget…

And then Filmways backed out, taking their money with them. But Michael Deeley wasn’t about to give up so easily, and managed to convince three companies to jointly finance the film – giving us one of the greatest science fiction movies ever made.


5. Jaws, 1975 – Steven Spielberg, Zanuck/Brown & Universal

Once you’ve seen Jaws, ‘realism’ quality of the older film notwithstanding, you just can’t look at the ocean the same way again. That, and you’ll be forever cursed to use the eerie two-note “Daa-dum…” in just about any suspenseful moment.

At first, Jaws was set upon very eagerly by the producers Zanuck and Brown, and even Steven Spielberg fell into the trap. The entire idea was based on a book that all three of them loved. They would later say that, if they had just read the book a second time, they would have decided against tackling a movie that would need to have some really complicated scenes – and really complicated scenes out to sea.

There were so many problems during filming that it was nicknamed “Flaws” at one point. Most of the problems were linked to the mechanical shark, Bruce, that was used. But that was only one of their troubles – Richard Dreyfuss confessed that "We started the film without a script, without a cast, and without a shark.". In the end, the script for the next day’s filming was usually written the night before, after the scriptwriter had dinner with the cast and crew to get their input. Dreyfuss, who plays the shark expert Hooper, and Shaw, the shark hunter Quint, also had quite the feud going – which became really heated on the last day of shooting when the boat began to sink.

But it all worked out in the end. And, even though Steven Spielberg went quite a bit over budget and lamented that his career might be ended by the film, it was a huge success. It’s still considered to be one of the greatest films ever made, and was inducted into the film registry in 2001 – ensuring that many future generations will enjoy the pleasures of severe Selachophobia.


6. The Shining, 1980 – Stanley Kubrick, Peregrine, Hawk & Warner Brothers

When it comes to horror, just about every fan of the genre knows about The Shining. The movie, although not a particular favourite of author Stephen King’s, still stands as one of the greatest horror films ever made. Even so, the chilling film almost never made it to the glory of the big screen.

The biggest threat that faced the making of the legendary psychological horror that was The Shining was… the psychological horror that is Stanley Kubrick. There’s no denying that Kubrick was a fantastic director when it came to the final visual results that moviegoers get to enjoy, often described as an absolute perfectionist. Unfortunately, Kubrick was also just as well-known as being one of the hardest directors to work with.

Jack Nicholson threw out the scripts that Kubrick sent him, knowing that things were bound to change with Kubrick’s whims. At least the actor had a thick skin to protect him. Shelley Duvall, the female lead, wasn’t so lucky. She was so stressed out during shooting that she reportedly became extremely ill and even started losing her hair. It’s a miracle that everyone managed to tough it out but we’re thankful that they did – and the result was nothing short of being a masterpiece.




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Thursday, 4 May 2017

6 Badass Monsters That Are Much Worse Than You Were Led to Believe

May 04, 2017 0
When it comes to monsters, most of us only know the (numerous) movie versions we’ve been shown – and, at least some of the time, those depictions try to capture at least some of the original monster. But, sometimes, to really understand just how badass that scary-as-hell monster really is, you’ve got to go back to its roots. Here are:

6 Badass Monsters That Are Much Worse Than You Were Led to Believe



1. The Jabberwock, Through The Looking Glass (Lewis Carroll)

If you’ve seen just about any Alice in Wonderland movie ever – such as Tim Burton’s more recent adaptation – You’ll be familiar with the Jabberwock. It’s usually depicted as an almost dragon-like lizard creature with sharp claws, wings and a really bad attitude. This has, for most people, become the accepted and expected portrayal of Carroll’s nightmarish beast. Here’s the thing: Carroll never described the Jabberwock in detail.

Yup, the description of the Jabberwock is exactly three lines long; it has eyes of flame, whiffles, and burbles when it moves. Doesn’t sound very scary, does it? But, if you read the whole poem and combine it with a little bit of imagination, what you can come up with can be terrifying. Knowing Carroll, it’s probably a safe bet to imagine it looking like a bad trip hallucination. Demonic insectoid clown, anyone?


2. Cthulhu and the Great Old Ones, The Call of Cthulhu (H.P. Lovecraft)

Cthulhu and his buddies have appeared in many films and games, usually looking like an alien impregnated herself with spliced genes from Davy Jones and a Chibi Dragon. While the depiction might be relatively accurate for Cthulhu, no image can quite conjure up the scaly, rubbery hideousness of a giant squid-faced creature who could drive anyone looking at him insane.

Here’s the interesting thing: more often than not, Cthulhu and the other Great Old Ones are shown as looking the same in popular media. If only. To name a few, there’s Gol-Goroth, the scaly, tentacle-covered giant toad and Quachil Uttaus who looks like a shrivelled mummified aborted child that can turn you to dust with a touch. Not to mention Nyogtha, who is little more than an inky shadow, and Bugg-Shash, a giant jelly filled with humanoid eyes and mouths. Once he’s drowned you in slime, he’ll control you like a puppet for the rest of eternity.

How’s that for an afterlife?


3. Dracula, Dracula (Bram Stoker)

Everyone knows the tragic story of Count Dracula the vampire, right? Lost his wife, renounced god, got cursed, and then he spends the remained of the movie and/or series trying to win back his beloved reincarnated Mina while avoiding the assholes – Jonathan, van Helsing, etc. – and sunlight. Right? Wrong.

The Dracula that so many of us have come to love is nothing like the original. First and foremost, he was no delicious Jonathan Rhys Meyers. He’s actually so hideous that he completely freaks poor Harker the hell out. He also didn’t have any ‘brides’, but instead they were called ‘the sisters’ – and they looked rather similar to Drac himself. In fact, the novel character had absolutely no redeeming qualities at all. He was, to put it bluntly, a predator, rapist and baby killer. Oh, and sunlight? He didn’t have that problem either.


4. Frankenstein’s Monster, The Modern Prometheus (Mary Shelley)

Ask most people and they will tell you Frankenstein’s monster is a giant, zombie like creature with a flat head, lots of scars, a few (loose) screws, and that he speaks mainly in grunts or like he’s missing half his brain - not counting a certain recent adaptation that turned him into a relatively hot demon slaying badass. More often than not, Frankenstein is a semi-sympathized lumbering zombie-creature that kills for little or no reason – something easily, and incorrectly – blamed on his borrowed criminal brain.

In the novel, the nameless monster is quite different. Even though still described as hideously ugly (translation, very scarred) with grace and long flowing hair, the creature is empathic, sensitive, emotional, and smart – he’s described as eloquent and philosophical, even. Although he’s still a killer, every kill is a move of calculated revenge against his creator, whom the creature blames for leaving him lost and alone in a cruel world. In the end, when even his creator is dead, the grief stricken creature decides to kill himself.

Let’s face it – smart monster beats brainless monster any day of the week.


5. The Nothing, The Neverending Story (Michael Ende)

To children who watched The Neverending Story, the destructive storm probably seemed like a horrible thing – especially since it was destroying Fantasia. The scared faces of the characters as they tried to run from the Nothing’s wind trying to pull them in probably left quite a few scarred memories and nightmares in their wake. Unfortunately – or, perhaps, fortunately – film can never quite capture the true horror that was the novel version of The Nothing.

The Nothing is a force of absolute oblivion that erased anything and everything from existence, described as a formless, featureless negation of existence. That was bad enough. But it didn’t suck things in, as the movie shows – Fantasians were actually compelled to jump into the Nothing and destroy themselves. Even worse, once it erased something in Fantasia, the Nothing would turn it into lies in the normal world. Yup, it wasn’t satisfied with destroying human imagination – it was set on destroying the rest of our world, too.


6. The Balrog Durin’s Bane, The Lord of the Rings (J.R.R. Tolkien)

Aside from the running, screaming and Gandalf’s apparent death, the actual fight with the powerful Balrog lasted a fantastic minute. If you can call it a fight. And another minute and a half if you count Gandalf’s flashback. Not all that much, in the grand scheme of things. Still, the giant flaming beastie did make quite an impression. Sadly, the full power of the Balrog (and Gandalf, for that matter) is never really seen.

The Balrog, Durin’s Bane, was actually not that much taller than a man, although he could ignite his body in flames (or turn into a ‘thing of slime, stronger than a strangling snake’ when in the water) and did indeed wield a flaming sword and whip. On the surface, the movie adaptation was true enough to how things went down in the book. Here’s the catch: both Gandalf and Durin’s Bane are Maiar – powerful primordial spirits that helped shape the world.

Here’s the kicker – although his physical body is slain, as a Maiar, the Balrog’s spirit still lives.




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I am a lover of crazy little interesting facts, player of many games (PC, not console. DAMN YOU CONSOLE!), and creator of words, stories, and poems. Most importantly, I am a lover of my happy purple life!